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Bachelor Recap: Weeks 3-5

Bachelor Recap time–we’re covering 3 episodes in this one article (because I got a bit behind!)

WEEK 3: HIGHLIGHTS

MRS RIGHT (the talent show)

Of course, Joey takes his girls on a truly horrific/embarrassing talent show date. This is a show staple, and it never lands, imo. Quite like Sydney’s cheer, who brags the entire date about her skills being in pageants, and then falls flat on her performance.

Lexi definitely gets points for moxy claiming to be the world’s best kisser and then bringing him onto stage to “prove” it. I like that bold action. Edwina was ADORABLE in her song and I think she gets points for vulnerability. Maria had me dead though when she said she’s an introvert.

I was somewhat surprised that he chose Kelsey A for the date rose because honestly I forgot she was on the date. And on the show–she seems like a sweet girl but she doesn’t shine on national tv. Which isn’t even inherently bad! I just never remember her.

The Sydney, Medina, Maria drama of course, continues after he hands out the group rose and THE WHOLE REST OF THE EPISODE is about it. This is the dumbest fight about something that doesn’t even exist and I cannot FATHOM how 3 grown women are continuing this inane pettiness.

ONE-ON-ONE: JENN

Okay *finally* the Bachelor puts on a fun, legitimate date!! And Jenn is totally the girl for him to take surfing. It’s fun, it’s active, and it’s something people REALLY DO on dates! Plus Jenn is so cute and fun and just bright. She just gives yellow and I’m here for her.

My heart broke when she was talking about her dad. And the way that she owned how hard that was but then opened herself up to connection in spite of it, makes me think she’s a good pick for him. I DEFINITELY hope she has done the inner work through that, but the way she is and talks to him it seems like she has.

I just want to squeeze her. And also be her best friend. Maybe I have a crush on this girl, idk.

Producers, please make her the next Bachelorette if Joey doesn’t pick her.

But he gave her a rose (of course) so we’ll see how far she makes it. I predict she goes to hometowns at least.

SECOND GROUP DATE: TENNIS

Yeesh, this had so much potential to be a solid group date. Like, okay they took into account that he’s a tennis player, and had the girls play “on his turf” because he keeps saying that he’s looking for his doubles partner.

AND THEN THEY RUINED IT with the idiotic costumes. Why. Why. Why, why, why are we humiliating adults on national tv like this? I actually just fast-forwarded that nonsense.

Katelyn shares that she believes she is cursed because all the women in her family are single. It’s not a surprise that he gave her the rose, but I don’t think they have an ounce of chemistry.

Rachel got stuck to his sweater, and opens up about her dad, and tbh I think he likes her but I think he’s liked her progressively less each episode.

POOL PARTY:

Lmao they loooooove to pretend like it’s an emotional thing that the Bachelor is canceling the rose ceremony and INSTEAD HAVING A POOL PARTYYYY. WOOOO. Where all that happens is drama. They really are like: “okay there’s someone creating drama? Time for a pool party so we can get them drunk and blow this up.”

Sydney, unsurprisingly, inserts herself and tells Joey and calls it a “slay.” Which means she is FOR SURE going to Bachelor in Paradise. She knows that Joey isn’t that into her, so she’s just trying to sabotage Maria and get attention for her socials. But tbh Maria telling Joey that he can’t possibly like her if he likes Sydney was SOLID. Joey apparently does not know how to navigate conflict so Maria gonna do it for him lolol.

He sent home Evalin, (which actually kind of surprised me) Chrissa, and Starr.

WEEK 4/5:

Taking the girls to MALTA — this is one of their best locations. I actually just wanted this episode to not show anyone and only pan around the island. Hello, on my bucket list.

That’s probably why I liked his date with Kelsey A so much–because we got to see the city lol. And also I like Kelsey A! I like her for him, and she shared about her struggles with endometriosis and possible infertility. That is ROUGH, and I feel for her. I need to put her in contact with my chiropractor because he helped me heal my endometriosis, fr fr.

Girls–total sidenote: endometriosis is NOT a life-sentence. I went to dr’s for years and years and YEARS. I decided that I did not want to get surgery, OR BIRTH CONTROL, and that I was done going to western dr’s about this. I started exploring acupuncture, Chinese herbal medicine, and chiropractic therapy–and MY ENDOMETRIOSIS WENT AWAY. Like, obviously I can’t guarantee you’ll have the same journey/outcome as me, but I just have to be one voice to tell you, if no one else has, that your endometriosis CAN BE HEALED. And it can be done from the inside out, without surgery.

I see you, Kels. Don’t let this world trap you on a timeline out of fear.

And obviously, he gives her the rose.

GROUP DATE: THE KNIGHTS OF MALTA

Alright alright alright. They had the girls dress up as the knights of malta and it was funny. I enjoyed that as a history nerd. As much as I harp on the producers, I give them points on this one…until they made the girls jump for sausages. Like they had sausages swirling on a string that the girls had to catch with their mouths and it was a little pervy.

And of course fake Hannah B (Jess) is having an absolute kiniption over the entire date because she’s getting insecure about her connection to him. Why, you may ask?

Oh because she emotionally dumped on him to get the rose and to force a connection, and it worked for a hot second and now he’s pulling away. I can almost GUARANTEE that she does this exact pattern with every guy, and that she would say she has an anxious-attachment style and is constantly finding herself chasing men who are running from her.

If you find yourself habitually chasing men, and feeling SO STRONGLY about them in the beginning and then getting ghosted, you are probably engaging in emotional dumping. It’s an attempt to FORCE safety from someone else by oversharing before you have proper commitment/trust. And it is typically shared with “avoidant” types, because this is a core wound–most likely an emotionally unavailable dad or father figure that you HOPE will become filled/fixed by receiving safety from these guys. But they won’t/can’t give that to you.

If you are someone whose dating pattern = find a guy you’re super excited about, emotionally dumps right at the beginning, gets ghosted, you MOST LIKELY have a masculine wound. You’re externalizing your safety, and it’s perpetuating your deep-rooted insecurity. I share because I care.

2:1 SYDNEY AND MARIA

Of course, Maria and Sydney go on a 2:1 date on a boat around the Blue Lagoon and while the scenery is BEAUTIFUL the date is literally painful to watch. I feel for Maria on this date–Sydney seems like she’s really just out to get her. But Maria is also playing DIRTY by just dropping little comments about how much fun Malta is and “how could Sydney be sad in a place like this?” Girl can take care of herself, and it’s clear that Joey likes her more than he likes Sydney.

This date was really just to feel out whether or not Maria was being set up by Sydney…and he seems to believe that to be the case. So he sends Sydney home and gives Maria the rose.

Which in turn, sends all the other girls who are insecure about Maria into an absolute TIZZY.

The way Lea called out Medina for being nice to Maria because “Medina is friends with Sydney” was so sneaky and mean. Lea is the DARK HORSE I did not expect in this season, but that is a mean girl…

Unfortunately Joey sends home Edwina and Allison–both of whom I think are adorable. Allison didn’t seem to have a strong connection with Joey, but I just liked her. It DID seem like he had a good connection with Edwina though.

WEEK 5 — 1:1 SPAIN

First of all, I am obsessed with this location. My husband and I put Spain on our travel list this year, so this episode is having me extra excited, lol.

Second, riding off with Kelsey A on a vespa for the first date in Spain was romantic AF. Taking her exploring the city, and then having dinner in a breathtaking location was one of my fave dates on this show. Like it was simple and real and they were sooo cute together.

I’m making notes for what to do with my husband when we get to Spain.

Kelsey A just comes across as really sweet, and tbh I would guess she’s weird. Like in the best possible way–she has this energy that seems a little quirky and I hope she let’s that out more! I’m happy to get to see more of her, for sure. And I’m glad she got the rose at the end of her date.

GROUP DATE: PAINTING

This date was fun, and I loved seeing Maria and Jenn and some of these other girls who ARE confident in themselves and their connection with Joey just have fun and be a little silly (without the producers HUMILIATING THEM.)

Which is why I think he gave Maria the group rose! She was able to have fun even on the group date and just be outgoing and personable. AND I want to just point out how she even had 1:1 time with him (multiple times now) and she waited until this date to open up about her mom and the accident she was in.

Before this, she was leading with having fun and keeping things as light as possible between them–which is HEALTHY for initial connection building. The immediate emotional dumping with someone you’ve never built trust with is called TRAUMA BONDING and it is a huge red flag.

I loved that she waited until she could see that she can trust him, to open up about some of those hard things that have made her who she is.

1:1 DATE — RACHEL

The dancing date was sexy, tbh. I mean, what better date are you gonna get in Spain??

I like their connection a lot; I think they have fun together and they’re both emotionally calm. Rachel says multiple times that he makes her feel safe, and let me tell you: THAT’S THE THING.

That safety is what you need in a healthy, lasting relationship. Their energy together is just soft and reassured. So many singles are addicted to the emotional rollercoaster and seeking the fireworks and “lightning” but that isn’t love. Love isn’t chaos. It’s not the uncertainty and the destabilizing feeling that you can’t get enough of.

Love is home. It’s your safe place. And if your relationship isn’t where you feel the most confident and secure–it’s not a good relationship. Of course he gives her the rose on the date. I’m rooting for them…

COCKTAIL PARTY

Daisy is a GEM like checking on him and making sure he’s feeling reassured in this process. Which tells a lot about her character because she could EASILY be so caught up in how hard she has it with all the other women and being in the position she is–but instead she wants to make sure HE is doing well.

Dang it. She’s a keeper.

Jess, however, is a TIMEBOMB. She is acting out because she knows he’s not as invested in her–and that’s hard…but rather than building the connection deeper she is just self-imploding. She says “what if it’s better in my head than it really is?” YES. That is accurate, girl, he’s not that interested in her and her insecurity about it is driving him away. And having a breakdown about Maria taking time is not going to make him more interested…

Girl cannot hang, and this is not the environment for her. I think she has a long way to go before she is capable of being in a healthy relationship.

He ends up sending Medina and Autumn home. I don’t remember even seeing him talk to Autumn, and we didn’t see him really talk to Medina for the last few episodes, so not a big surprise on those two.

 

PHEW this article was a monster…so if you read the full thing: thank you.

Cheers to love!

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